worship in the city

A Day Off

2008-07-04T18:17:48Z

Happy Independence Day!

I am thankful today for the USA. I am thankful for our polical system, flawed as it may be. I am thankful that someone as powerful as Hilary Clinton can loose an election without there being a military coup or riots. Not only that, but she endorses her opponent. I believe that we will see the same thing in November, too. A gracious looser: that's a great blessing.

I am thankful for a day off even though it meant a frantic day yesterday. Today we're hangin out with Sarah's cousins Evelyn (swimming!) and the Larsens.

I've been bugging my wife going over and over the seminar that I am teaching next week at YXL. I don't really do this sort of thing except to occasionally give talks to my music team. I'm mostly afraid of talking too much. I need my wife to help me with using economy with my words. She's very good at clearly expressing ideas with few words.

Now it's time for me to get my swim suit on and hit the pool.

Beautiful Scandalous Night

2008-07-02T21:16:25Z

I know I'm probably way behind on discovering this song, but today it really spoke to me. It's a song by The Choir. Go to iTunes and buy it for a buck; I promise it's worth the money.

Go on up to the mountain of mercy
To the crimson perpetual tide
Kneel down on the shore
Be thirsty no more
Go under and be purified

Follow Christ to the holy mountain
Sinner sorry and wrecked by the fall
Cleanse your heart and your soul
In the fountain that flows
For you and for me and for all

At the wonderful tragic mysterious tree
On that beautiful scandalous night
You and me were atoned by His blood
And forever washed white
On that beautiful scandalous night

On the hillside you will be delivered
At the foot of the cross justified
And your spirit restored
By the river that pours
From our blessed Savior's side

Recording Project: electric tracking

2008-07-01T15:53:48Z

Yesterday I was back in the studio with Jacob. Despite the fact that my wife is sick again and was feeling pretty lousy. Her prayers were answered when both kids took their nap and gave her time to rest herself. Meanwhile, I was at sawhorse studios again and this time we were recording electric parts. I put new strings on the old Howard Roberts Fusion and it sounded great! I went back to my old gauge, .12 mm, which is a little fatter. It makes the tone more rich, less quack and more chunk. Jacob has an arsenal of amps and effects, so I left my rig at home. We use a big 2 x12 Koch amp for Before I Knew, but the rest was tracked on a 60's era amp called a Magnatone that Jacob had. This amp had a really cool tremelo sound that we employed on My Eyes Are On You that took me back to Bruce Cockburn's Nothing But A Burning Light recording. The other songs we did were New Creation, My Refuge, and Your Presence Is Here.

After we did those five tunes, we did scratch vocals for all the songs to make the whole process easier. For readers unfamiliar to the world of recording, "scratch" means we record a quick pass that is not intended for the final version; it is just used to help us be aware of where we are in the song. The actual vocals will be one of the last things that is recorded.

The next step will be setting up a time for the bass player to come in. That will happen after our trip to Chattanooga.

You can pray for more financial resources. I asked Jacob for an invoice because I don't really know how much we owe him yet. I don't think we have spent more that we have saved up, but it's possible that the money will run out before tracking is completed.

A Sinner Can Worship

2008-06-27T19:49:11Z

Sin can paralyze.

There are weeks when I come to worship with a conceptual understanding of original sin and even my own individual guilt, but it's only words. I can say, "I'm a sinner" but looking back on my week, I might not be able to recall an actual sin act. It's not because I didn't sin; it's because I was a little too busy being self-righteous to notice.

This Friday, I feel more like David when he wrote Psalm 51. (No, by God's grace, I didn't sleep with some guy's wife and then have him murdered.) But I definitely relate to David's attitude this week. When he wrote this Psalm, he was aware of his sin, and aware of how sin had turned his heart away from worship. Part of his cry to the Lord is to have worship restored in his heart. He doesn't want shame to drive him away from the compassionate grace of his loving Father. He pleads for mercy on the basis of God's unfailing love and not on the basis of his own reputation or record. It's a good thing too because neither of those would stand before God's holiness.

David was filled with grief about his sin. When a relationship is broken, I have a tendency to avoid the person and wallow in my own grief. Sometimes, when I sin, I feel like my relationship with God has been broken and I can't go back to him in prayer or in worship. Sometimes worship seems so wrong, so awkward. Like an awkward conversation with an ex-girlfriend. It feels so weird. I guess there's nothing to do in that situation but cry out to God and appeal to his unfailing love. This weekend, my cry is, "open my lips."

Save me from bloodguilt, O God, the God who saves me, and my tongue will sing of your righteousness. O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare your praise. -Psalm 51:14-15

Song Show Plus 7 is driving me mad, mad I say!

2008-06-26T21:06:20Z

I had to pick out a new presentation software program for our church. This is all that I've been doing for a few weeks now and I am starting to go slightly nuts.
All work and no play make Kirk a dull boy.
All work and no play make Kirk a dull boy.
All work and no play make Kirk a dull boy.

Finding Your Space

2008-06-25T16:41:53Z

It's common in the world of making music to talk about struggling with finding "the space". Musicians may not use that term exactly, but they mean the same thing. It's the state of mind where you stop trying so hard to sound good or not screw up and you just play. It's a great feeling when it comes and it's the kind of thing that keeps musicians driven to play or perform again.

(In college, we had a master class with Kenny Werner who kind of originated the term. He wrote a book called "Effortless Mastery" that is all about finding the space. It's kind of a "new age" spirituality kind of thing, and so I had to take it in with a grain of salt.)

The past few weeks, I have felt like I was outside the space musically and in worship. I feel like I've been trying too hard to make a certain worship feeling happen or to make a certain musical experience happen by my effort. It might be because my health problems have been a distraction. It might be because the summer schedule is so light and I've taken a lot of days off. Regardless of the reason, it's been a little while since I've been looking forward to Sunday. I'm so thankful that grace is bigger than my feelings. I don't need to feel something to make it true. My relationship to God is not defined by my feelings at a certain time.

How do you get back in the space? Scripture meditation, prayer, practicing, personal worship?

Recording Project: acoustic tracking

2008-06-24T14:34:13Z

Yesterday, I was finally able to get back into Sawhorse studios to resume work on the recording. Jacob and I were able to complete the acoustic guitar parts for 6 of the 12 songs in about 4.5 hours.

It was the first time I got to do some actual tracking myself for this recording. It was exciting, but it also exposed a lot of the flaws in my playing. For example, I have a tendency to bend the low string out of tune on certain chords like the E/G# in "Search Me". That's the kind of thing you can't just fix later because if one of the six strings is out of tune, you can't tune it up without affecting the other five strings. It took me back to my college days of spending hours a day on my technique. In a live setting, you can fake it or cut corners. But, in the studio, the playback doesn't lie.

But we got through it and I feel pretty good about the final product. Next Monday, we'll be doing some electric stuff. I am really excited about that!

A Very Late Valentine's Day Video

2008-06-21T07:07:59Z

Boo-yahed By the Bible

2008-06-20T14:40:41Z

This morning I was reading my bible. I am using the One-Year bible reading method that gives you passages to read in order to finish the whole bible in a year. Each day includes a passage from the Old Testament and New Testament, a Psalm and a Proverb. This morning, I was in one of those "win-my-theological-argument" bible reading attitudes. I've been wrestling with an issue that my friend has a differing opinion about. So today, I was on the lookout for anything that would prove my argument. So after reading the Old Testament passage (which I skimmed over because it was irrelevant to my argument) I read a passage from Hebrews that perfectly illustrated my position.

Score:
Kirk: 1
Opponent: 0

Then I read a Psalm that perfectly illustrated my friend's position. Blast!

Score:
Kirk: 1
Opponent: 1

I was a little perplexed. Why is the bible always contradicting itself? Can't God make up his mind about things? I'm looking for concrete answers to life's questions, but the bible seems to be too open ended sometimes, too relative. Sometimes condition A is true and sometimes condition B is true. How am I supposed to win my argument and gloat if the bible won't confirm what an idiot my friend is for contradicting my wonderful pearls of wisdom?

Finally, I read the proverb for the day:

"As iron sharpens iron,
so one man sharpens another." -Proverbs 27:17

Boo-yah! The bible just slapped my upside the head and reminded me of how arrogant I was being. No man has perfect insight into the word of God, and we need each other to be able to get a fuller picture of the world. I was blocking out what my friend had to say because their opinion was different than mine. In fact, they weren't even contradicting me; they were adding to what I was thinking in order to give me a fuller picture of the truth.

God Killed Ezekiel's Wife to Make a Point

2008-06-18T15:18:28Z

There's a line of theological thought out there that says that the good and bad things in your life are a measure of how good or bad your standing is with God. If a church or ministry is loosing members, is under attack, or financially hurting then they ask, "What are we doing to make God angry at us?" If a church or ministry is growing, financially loaded, and succeeding people look at them and try to copy their format to get their special sauce.

Ezekiel was being used by God in amazing ways to speak the truth in love to his people. He was faithful to God and gifted to speak His Word. But, God decided to kill Ezekiel's wife.

Ezekiel 24:15-18
The word of the LORD came to me: "Son of man, with one blow I am about to take away from you the delight of your eyes. Yet do not lament or weep or shed any tears. Groan quietly; do not mourn for the dead..." So I spoke to the people in the morning, and in the evening my wife died. The next morning I did as I had been commanded.

I've had some hard stuff to deal with in the past months. Persistent health problems. Nothing serious, but enough to be a real thorn in my side. But, God has never made a promise to me that I would never suffer. He has never promised that I would be free from disease, loss, poverty, or violence. He has promised that I would be given the freedom to to take up my cross, sacrifice my life, give away my wealth, and suffer persecution in the name of Jesus.

Tonight: Return To Forever

2008-06-17T22:45:55Z

I am expecting egregious amount of overplaying and an obscene display of pointless virtuosity.

New Version of Movable Type

2008-06-17T15:04:08Z

I am messing with this updated version of Movable Type. I kind of accidentally wiped my old styles clean, so I'll be messing with stuff trying to get something back. I guess worship in the city was due for a make-over.

Strep Throat Really Sucks.

2008-06-17T13:07:25Z

I've been laid out with Strep Throat for almost a week now. I gave it to my wife also. She and I share a lot of germs; it's one of those things about marriage. We finally went to a health clinic yesterday and got a test. Apparently, we've both got a gigantic case of it. Our tests came back, really positive. So, now we're on antibiotics. Cool.

Supposedly, our 2 month old son is not at risk of getting strep. Hopefully Joanna will stay healthy. She has been asking all week long to share our food, or drink and we've had to keep turning her down.

I have one more day of staying out of the office, then it's back into the saddle. Today, I'll be trying to work from home (in between diaper changes and whatnot.)

So please pray for our recovery...and wash your hands.

Dancers Delight

2008-06-06T15:03:50Z

In my high school, we were not allowed to have any organized "dance" type event until my freshmen year. I was on the student council and I got to help plan the dance. I love planning big parties, so this was a great time for me. The dance itself was a little bit like the movie "Footloose" except that in that movie, the teens all of a sudden know all these complex break-dancing moves even though they've never danced before. At my school, we just flopped around with glee at the freedom we were given. (By the time I was graduating, I started to wonder if the ban on organized dances was not such a bad idea. Our "Christian" student body quickly learned how to bump and grind as if it was MTV Spring Break.)

Even though in our brokenness, we often abuse the freedom to dance, I believe that dancing is a good gift from the Lord that can even be used in worship. I have challenged the NCF Music Team to memorize some scripture every weekend and this weekend's verse gives a specific call to get on the floor and move your body.

Psalm 149:3-4 3 Let them praise his name with dancing and make music to him with tambourine and harp. 4 For the LORD takes delight in his people; he crowns the humble with salvation.

There are two classic narratives (that I can think of) that refer to dancing in the bible. One is the story of David dancing before the Lord, making himself undignified in fear of the awesome power of the Lord's holy presence. The other is Miriam taking up a tambourine and dancing after the Egyptian army was swallowed up by the Red Sea. In both stories, their dance was a response of reverence mixed with joy (see John Frame's "Worship in Spirit and in Truth" for a discussion of reverence and joy). This is a great way to tell what kind of dancing is appropriate in worship. Does it reflect reverence? Does it reflect joy?

Let me explain what I mean by dancing. Dancing is any thing you do to move your body in time with the music. Swaying is dancing. Clapping and tapping your feet are dancing. Moving your shoulders or your hips is dancing. Hand movements that demonstrate the meaning of the song like in "Ain't No Rock" are dancing. Dancing can be organized like a praise dancing or mime; it can also be spontaneous.

Psalm 149:4 gives us a reason to dance. First of all the Lord delights in you. I love that word, "delight". (Not just because it's the name of the early '90s classic dance group that gave the world, "Groove Is In The Heart.") Delight is a word that is very strong. I might appreciate time alone, but I delight in my wife. I might enjoy the company of friends, but I delight in my children. The Lord delights in His people, and that means that we can get undignified when we dance.

It also says that the Lord crowns the humble with salvation. He delights in us, but he also was to see us embrace the same humble heart that the Man of Sorrows had. As we worship with celebration and gladness, we do it with humble hearts before the Lord knowing that we have been blessed beyond what we could ever earn or deserve.

Sometimes, when I am leading worship at New City Fellowship, I can see somebody who looks like they would never move an inch in a million years start to twitch and then start to sway a little. Sometimes, they start to bob their head with the music (doing the "white man's overbite.") Sometimes that person completely forgets about the fact that they would never stand a chance on "So You Think You Can Dance?" Sometimes, they are filled with a kind of reverence and joy that envelops them in such a powerful way that their whole body starts to praise His name with dancing.

Groove is in the heart indeed.

Day 2 wrap-up

2008-06-04T12:17:19Z

We completed the drum tracking for the other 7 songs:
I Am My Beloved's
Walk The Talk
Thorn In My Side
My Eyes Are On You
New Creation
Your Presence Is Here
My Refuge

It was exhausting, but now we can move on to the next phase which can be done in shorter times slots. I set up a schedule with Jacob to meet for the next three Monday afternoons. Next Monday we'll work on some acoustic parts. Over the next few weeks I have to nail down what I want to do for each song so that we can get a plan for how to schedule our time.

Joe Meyer did an excellent job playing the drums. He was pretty amazing to watch because he could usually get the part exactly right on the first take and we'd do another one just to be safe.

I was able to bring home the drum parts with the scratch vocal/guitar stuff. It was pretty cool to bring it home and put it on the CD player. It's real tangible progress.

Please continue to pray for me. Pray that the Lord will provide us with more financial resources since the entire project is being paid for out of pocket. Please pray for Sarah and my kids because I will be gone a lot. Please pray that I will not be ashamed of the gospel of Christ as I share these rather emotionally vulnerable songs with the non-Christians I'm working with. (I felt so embarrassed sharing "I Am My Beloved's" with the guys yesterday. It's the most Jesus-is-my-boyfriend kind of song I've ever written.)